Growth Spurts

I picked up a new book over these last few weeks, Brennan Manning’s, Abba’s Child, and recently found the time to dive in.  And it’s one of those books that comes to you at a time when you need it most, that somehow has a way of finding you, and I am grateful it did. I find that Manning seems to have a way of speaking to the very depths of my being, inspiring me to not only walk closer to the Savior, in constant recognition of my own brokenness and need for grace, but also serves as a good reminder to always strive to live a life that shows grace and compassion towards others.

I guess that’s what I love so much about Manning’s books, having read The Ragamuffin Gospel a few years ago, is his lack of pretense.  It is a rare find, and unfortunately I’d have to say even in myself, to hear someone speak from such an honest place, and currently in the throws of the book I hope to glean some wisdom as to how one gets to such a place, to how one “arrives.”

So far I’ve already marked several key sentences that struck a chord, even an entire chapter, the one concerning our Authentic Self vs. our False Self, appropriately titled, The Imposter, recognizing as I did that still small voice of God saying, “Jen, this is what I want you to work on.”  Sigh.

And yet, I sigh with hope, ever mindful that we are all works in progress and there are times we go about our merry business, oblivious, until something upsets the balance and God so gently (and I use the word lightly) points out, “we need to work on this.”  Ugh, and just when I thought I had all my crap figured out.

But God is like that, orchestrating events in our lives, or merely allowing them, and then turning them around to form something in us, change something in us, that makes us a little bit more Christ reflecting, and I am convinced that this is God’s ultimate agenda in almost everything, or in other words, what I like to refer to as the great emptying and sometimes the great emptying can be a painful process, but one I’m finding as the years go by, that God seems to only allow to come to us in growth spurts, and for that – I am thankful for.  Like the child; we grow, level out for awhile, and then grow again – and yes, unfortunately growing pains are included and at the moment, I feel them.

I feel them because as I read Manning, God calls me to authenticity, to take off the mask of the false self, who is always striving; for the approval of others, the attention of others, even to self-protect from others (and for me, this is the biggie), and instead, to just live in the freedom that I don’t have to, I don’t have to self-protect anymore. That if only I can remember that it’s God who affirms me, loves me infinitely, delights in me even, then it’s He who will get me to that place where I won’t feel the need to put on pretense anymore, because when we live under the guise of the false self we can miss out on so many of God’s blessings and the blessing that we can be and should be to others.

In the middle of growing pains, what I’m finding about growth spurts is this: that the more we go through them the more we start to recognize them for what they truly are: a chance to draw nigh our Heavenly Father, bask in His presence, and let Him transform us – to be like the child that waits in wonder and anticipation of what they’ll be when they grow up. “Oh, make me like you, Lord, make me like you!”

“Play Ball!”

I have a favorite quote at the bottom of my blog and it goes like this, “the true mark of a Christian is not one who is perfect, but one who strives to have Christ perfected in them,” and I honestly can’t remember where I came across this saying, or even who said it for that matter, only that it struck me as profound – and it is.  It serves as a reminder to us all that we will fail in our walks with God, time and time again, and yet, I believe God isn’t as concerned as much with our failings as He is with our ability to get back up, back on, and back in the game.

True, when we fail it has the ability to set us back, but for how long and how much, I believe, is really up to us.  The one thing we can be certain of though, is that God isn’t in the booing section.  When we fail/fall He is more apt to come out into the arena, pick us up, dust us off, and then say, “now, get back out there!  Get back in the game!”  because just as with sports, there’s no time for sulking.  We can’t win if we’re sulking, brooding, having pity parties or lamenting over past sins, and believe me, we will have them, we all have them, but God has the remedy for this and it’s called repentance.

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9)

And there’s that word “if” again and “if” is an action-y kind of word, is it not?  It literally requires that we do something and that something when it comes to sin in our lives is hopefully honing the ability to quickly recognize when it rears its ugly head and if and when it does to immediately take it to the cross.  Repentance simply means recognizing a wrong doing, showing sincere sorrow for it, and then turning from it.  In other words, when you take it to the cross, leave it there, because this is what God does.

He does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.  For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. (Psalm 103:10-12).

And so if God is able to forget our sins then shouldn’t we?  And not to make light of sin, because we should never make light of it, but rather, once repentance takes place to learn from it, grow from it and then simply – move on.  To look God in the face after He’s put our band-aid on and say, “okay, I’m ready to get back in the game again.”  Because honestly, I don’t think there’s anything that could make God happier.

For as a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him. (Psalm 103:13).

“Play ball!”

But The Greatest of These is Love

If you have never had the opportunity to hear Corrie ten Boom speak then now is your chance! I remember seeing a television broadcast of her once and thinking, “wow, now there is someone who has a testimony of just how deep, how wide, how far, and how high is the love of Christ!” Someone who’s really been through it, who’s seen some of the worst atrocities in the last century, yet not only lived to tell about it but lived to tell about how Christ’s love always wins out.

When and if you have the time just click this link www.archive.org/details/SchoolOfPrayer-TheGreatestOfTheseIsLove-ByCorrieTenBoom-Sermon to hear one of her sermons; “The Greatest of These is Love.”

It’s about an hour long so make sure you can set aside the time to listen but I promise you won’t be disappointed. Whenever I have had the opportunity to hear Corrie ten Boom speak or have read any of her writings I have always been blessed. She is full of insight and wisdom and I especially liked her flashlight analogy in this sermon.

Be blessed! For the greatest of these truly is… love!

Taking Inventory

And sometimes this is a good place to be; taking inventory. When God hands you a clipboard and says, “let’s see, shall we?” And I think even for myself that’s what God’s been doing with me over these last few weeks; taking inventory, “what’s really going on inside of me?” Those places God still has yet to get at, or areas He wants to bring to healing, or maybe even places I have yet to surrender, so, I guess that’s what I mean by taking inventory, “What’s really going on inside of me?”

There are always places in our lives that God wants to get at. Places that perhaps are barren wastelands, or maybe they even used to be gardens now over grown with weeds. Places of deep hurts and woundings, of disappointments and longings, places maybe even we ourselves have closed the doors to, “I don’t even want to deal with that!” we say, but God? He is never like that. Oh, He may for a time let us ignore things but then eventually (and perhaps He knows it’s when we’re ready) He comes back to that place, that place He wants to transform in us, that place He wants to free us from and then He says, “now what about this?” and we might respond as we try to stand in front of the mess, “what are you talking about God?” “This,” He says pointing, “now, what about this?” And God is so funny like that, with Him it really is a parent/child relationship.

Taking Inventory; what to keep, what to throw out, and “what do I need God’s help with in changing?” Trust me, there are always areas in our lives that if we look at honestly we could all say, “God, weed this out of me!” and then, “in it’s place, plant something that is pleasing,” because it’s when I’m taking inventory it’s then that I’m looking. Looking at those areas of my life that still aren’t “Christ reflecting,” or those areas of my life that He still isn’t Lord over and really, isn’t that what we should all be seeking? Or maybe it’s asking? “Lord, are you really Lord over all of my life?” “Have I really given you everything?” It’s then that He hands us the clipboard and says, “well, let’s take inventory, shall we?” Because with God it’s all about illuminating; what to keep, what to throw out, and “what do I still need God’s help with in changing?” It’s a growth process, so grow with me.

How Shall We?

How shall we reach the lost? How shall we reach the broken hearted, the wounded and those who live a life enslaved to sin? How shall we reach them Oh God? How shall the Body of Christ stir up the hearts so that we should all turn to You in repentance? How shall we see ourselves Lord as we truly are, in filth, and brokenness, our need for a Savior? How shall we do this? How shall we open eyes that fail to see and ears that fail to hear? Tell us Lord, how shall we? Do our hearts ache for the oppressed and the unlovely? Do our hearts ache for those in bondage? Do we ourselves see even our own impoverished need? Has God brought us to that place of great emptying? How shall we ever get there Lord? How shall we? How shall we become Your great hands of mercy? How shall we feed the poor and needy? How shall we bind up the wounds of profuse bleeding? How shall we become the Spotless Bride of Christ that then they would see God your infinite love and tender mercies? Oh tell us Lord, how do we? How do we become all that You long for us to be? How do we be emptied? To fall on our faces in repentance, to remember that we are but dust? To remember that all that we are is because of You and belongs to You? How do we get to this place Oh God? How do we get to this place where we long only to please You? To live a life of quiet holiness and obedience unto You? You who died on a cross for us. You who died and nailed the sins of the world there pierced in your flesh to bear once and for all, for all of us. How do we Lord remember this? How do we recall all of Your loving acts of kindness? To let Your unfailing Love transform us so all that we are, all that we do honors You? How do we Lord? How do we become the Children of God? Oh, show us Lord. Open our weary and blinded eyes Lord that maybe then a dying world would see Your amazing Love, Your Saving Grace, and Jesus poured out and poured through us, you and me. How do we Lord? Have mercy.